You’ve read The Lord Of The Rings more than once. You may even make it an annual tradition.
You have stacks of comic books laying around your apartment that you haven’t read or put away in your boxes yet. In fact, you are a top 20 poster (by number of posts) on an internet comic book discussion forum.
You have made a joke about someone wearing a red shirt, and how they probably won’t survive long.
You can name all 13 original members of the G.I. Joe team (without reference), and you know who the “14th” original Joe was, and who he was a reference to.
You have used “frakking” as a swear word.
THACO. You know it.
Of course you have seen Cowboy Bebop, in the original Japanese with subtitles, of course. None of that dub crap.
You have lost an entire night’s sleep due to Starcraft.
Transformers? Best toy ever.
You’ve thought about what you would do if the Zombie Apocalypse happens. You’ve got Mad Max contingencies too.
You have a batman action figure on top of your refrigerator.
You have painted Warhammer miniatures before. In fact, it is possible you painted an entire goblin warhammer army. Possibly.
Just being a few feet away from Leonard Nimoy was very exciting. Heck, even Brent Spiner was pretty cool.
You number of times you have seen the Star Wars movies is a 3 digit number. In fact, you camped out overnight to see Episode 1 at midnight the day it came out. Oh, and you own a few Star Wars t-shirts.
You have flown across the country to go to a comic book convention, and San Diego Comic-Con was a blast this year!
Who is this loser?
I am describing someone I know very well.
In fact, I’m describing me. Everything above describes me. No exaggeration.
I am, for all intents and purposes, a dork. My specialty within the geeky genres is comic books and Star Wars. I have about 3,000 comics in my closet, carefully stored away in plastic bags and boxes. My most prized book is my copy of Showcase 22, the first appearance of Green Lantern from 1959.
There was a time when I had read pretty much every Star Wars novel that had been released, and I once played Star Wars trivial pursuit, and you know how if you get the answer correct you get to keep going? Well, I won on my first turn.
If you want to discuss the merits vs. the weaknesses of Superman, you should sit down and get comfortable. This might take a while, and I may ask you to read Action Comics 775 to prove my point.
Who needs women when you have Trek?
Dorks are stereotyped as being pretty bad with women. It doesn’t matter what kind of dork you are: Comic geek, D&D nerd, Trekker, Star Wars dork, Otaku, or gamer, the stereotype is there, and often times fairly true.
I like all this geeky stuff, but I don’t let it get in the way of meeting and dating women.
I have never hid any of my geekeries from women (except Warhammer), in fact the huge pile of longboxes that hold all my comics has been pretty hard to ignore. This has never made a woman decide to leave my bedroom though.
I got the full 3 day pass to Wondercon this year, San Francisco’s biggest comic book convention, but I also met a woman out at the bar after the convention with all my geeky comic nerd friends, took her home that night, and dated her for a while. Yes, she knew I was going to the convention all weekend.
This week’s theme is dating for dorks.
I have read about folks that have dated a woman for years without telling her that he collects comics, out of a fear of how she will react.
Some dorks will not let their freak flag fly, or just resign themselves to believing that no woman could love them because of their nerdy indulgances.
You don’t have to give up on your beloved comics, or movies, or games. You can date fantastic women too. The two aren’t mutually exclusive.
All week I’m gonna have posts about how to have your cake, and eat it too.
Because after all, there will be cake.
And this cake is not a lie.